Morton J. Marcus is an economist formerly with the Kelley School of Business, Indiana University. His column appears in Indiana newspapers.
Goober Goodenough is a long-time member of the Indiana General Assembly. You probably know the roadside signs he puts up before every election: “Goober is Goodenough for Indiana.”
It has surprised me that Goober has not had a bigger role in the current state administration to advance his ideas. For instance, take his solution for the problem of declining state revenues from gambling.
We all know Ohio has done a job on us by opening casinos that compete directly with our facilities in Lawrenceburg and Rising Sun. Combine that with the national decline in gambling due to the Great Recession and Indiana has a serious shortfall of money flowing to the state treasury.
Goober has the answer: a lottery for human organs. There is an unbelievable demand for human hearts, lungs, livers and other body parts. Today, America determines who gets the necessary organs by letting medical experts match donors with recipients according to health status and biological determinants.
A lottery, however, should be very acceptable to our current legislature and administration. If the feds have any rules against it, then they’ll have to lump it as we have declared in the Medicaid and Common Core areas.
Naturally, the wealthy will buy more lottery tickets than the poor and improve their chances at winning a spleen, but that’s just the way the market works. Nonetheless, there remains an element of chance and the poor will not be frozen out by their limited resources.
Goober adds that a poor person who wins the lottery can then resell the ticket on a secondary market. This option permits the winner to choose between wealth and health. What could be fairer than that?
If this sounds ghoulish, Goober’s thoughts on the Central American children entering Indiana and the rest of America may be offensive. Instead of the federal government placing these children temporarily in welcoming homes, Goober would offer them for auction.
A web site of candidates for adoption would be set up. Perhaps the federal government could do this, but more appropriately, the individual states would be in charge because of their well-known affinity for compassionate innovation.
This web presence could be a merger of Ebay with the sales sites managed by real estate agents and auto dealers. There would be charming pictures of the youngsters along with their characteristics (literacy, weight-lifting capacity, 100 meter speed, etc.). Bids could submitted by interested parties with the proceeds going to the state’s general fund. Then the states would be more welcoming of these migrants.
Goober suggests making these children more appealing to those who don’t want them here by eliminating child labor and school attendance laws. Thus, these waifs can become productive members of our society immediately. No doubt you know many people who would be delighted to have added hands doing household chores.